I feel like I'm losing my dad...to his 23 y.o fiance =/

My dad started dating Rosa about a month and a half ago, if it has even been that long. In about 2 weeks, he was already in love. About a week after that, he proposed. And she obviously said yes. Rosa has a 3 month-old baby. Rosa jr weighs just about as much as Jay does. And Jay is a year and almost 3 months old. After my dad proposed, things between he and I have gone down-hill. Especially after I met her.
We got along great, but then a few days after I met her, my dad started criticizing my daughter's eating habits. She doesn't like baby food. She doesn't like the texture. Just like she doesn't like mashed potatoes, either. See the similarity? 
Lately, my dad hasn't called me as much as he used to. Before Rosa came along, my dad and I used to have LONG conversations. I would tell him everything that was going on in my life, then I would post whatever was going on, here. Now, the things I have posted about my mom lately, my dad STILL doesn't know the whole story. I tried talking to him Friday, and he cut me off after not even 5 minutes of talking to him, saying, "I'm sorry, but I didn't call you to have a long conversation. I wanted to see how you guys were doing. I'm busy at work, and I need to call Rosa."

I'm not jealous at all. But I hate that our relationship, and our friendship is changing. 

Two weeks ago, Canito, Jay, and I were at my Grandmother's house, and my dad was there too. He started arguing with me about Jay's eating habit's. Canito and I told him that it wasn't the taste she doesn't like, its the texture. The ONLY baby food that she WILL eat, is applesauce, and bananas. When I tried talking, he said, "Stephanie, your not listening to me." I had to shut up and let him keep criticizing me about how my daughter eats. Since she won't eat the baby food, I put it in her bottle. She's getting the nutrients and vitamins from her formula, as well as the vitamins and nutrients from the baby food. He doesn't see it that way. I try not to argue with him, because I end up losing anyways. He ALWAYS has to have the last word. Whether he's wrong, or right. 

Now, everytime he calls me, he's either complaining that he's broke or tired, or he's criticizing me about the way I'm raising my daughter. I think he doubts my abilities to be a mother since I had her at a young age.  But then again, his fiance is only FOUR YEARS OLDER THAN ME! She'll be 24 this month, and I'll be 20 next month!

The other day, he told me that Rosa jr. was ALREADY eating baby food. AT 3 MONTHS! That is seriously unhealthy. Babies have holes in their stomachs before 6 months, and baby food is harder to digest for them, because of those holes. (and get this: my aunt told me that. [see below for details on my aunt]) I tell him that, and he tells me, "Well she's eating baby food for babies that are 3 months." THERE'S NO SUCH THING!!!! Formula, and breast milk is the ONLY thing your baby should be eating/drinking before 5 months.That's when you can start off with baby cereals. 

Everytime my dad calls me now, I end up in tears. I tell Canito what happened, and he says most likely Rosa is saying things to him, about our parenting skills, and he tells me about them. Now, all he can do is compare my daughter, with her daughter.
He was NEVER bitching about Canito or I not having a job. But now since he has a new girl in his life, he's broke. If it's not from going out with Rosa, its from buying her or her baby things. AND he helps my sister-in-law pay her bills. With my SIL, I don't mind AT ALL. She's like a sister to me, and I love her as much. She has 2 kids, and she does it ALONE. She doesn't have a job, either, because with this economy, NO ONE is hiring. If they are hiring, its far away from where she lives. She also just got a hysterectomy. She's only about 23-24 years old.

So anyways, I feel like my dad is abandoning me, because for the past 2 weeks, we haven't had more than a 5 minute conversation, if that much. Whereas, he talks to Rosa, and sees her EVERYDAY. He doesn't call me when he gets home anymore because he's talking to her. And when we do talk, like I said, he's either criticizing me, "How's [Jay]? Is she ok? No fever? Is she eating ok? Is she still size 3 diapers?", or he's telling me he's broke, or that he's tired.
Rosa's daughter is size 3 diapers-at 3 months. Size 3 diapers are from 16lbs-28lbs. Jay weighs about 23lbs right now. 

Also last week, my dad called me to tell me that he called my aunt. (My aunt lives in New Jersey, and she's a pediatrician. She was Jay's doctor when we lived in NY.) So my dad tells me that he called my aunt, and it seemed like he called her JUST TO ASK HER ABOUT JAY'S EATING HABITS. So he tells me that she said that she NEEDS to eat her baby food, and that I can't keep putting her baby food in her bottles. I tell him it's not my fault that Jay doesn't like the texture. I'm NOT going to force her to eat it. He says, "Stephanie, I don't think you understand the importance of her eating." HELLO?!??! How the fuck can I NOT understand? She's MY daughter.
I tell Canito to call his mom to ask what it is I'm doing wrong. My SIL did the SAME thing with her son. She would put the baby food in his bottles. My mother-in-law never said anything about it. She has NEVER criticized me. I'm doing a damn good job with raising my daughter. She also told me that now Jay should start eating step 3 baby foods, and she should eat them by herself. And you know what? THAT'S THE ONLY WAY SHE'LL EAT HER BABY FOOD. When my dad yet again asked me if she's eating ok, I tell him that my MIL told me that she's step 3 in baby foods, and that she's eating it by herself. He says, "Good! I'm glad she's finally eating it!"

He tells me a lot: Stephanie. I don't think you understand the importance of ________________. ALL THE TIME. 
For my birth control: Stephanie, I don't think you understand how important it is for you NOT to get pregnant.
For anything and everything he says I don't understand how important it is. 

One time, Canito, Jay and I stood the night at his house, and we were talking about birth control. He tells me: Stephanie, I don't think you understand the importance of you not getting pregnant. You need to understand that if you get pregnant, I can't help you anymore than I'm helping you now." NO ONE IS ASKING YOU TO! WTF?!?!?! 
I HATE that I'm dependant on him. Ever since I was 14, (see earlier posts) I have been independant and I would buy my own shit. It wasn't a lot of money that I would have, but I would buy what I needed with it. I don't like being dependant on him. I don't like depending on anyone. I like doing and buying shit for myself. Not with anybody's help. And the fact that he throws that in my face ALL THE TIME, it makes me feel like a failure, and a piece of shit. I went CRAZY looking for a job Friday night, because I just can't deal with it anymore. I NEED a job. DESPERATELY. I want to pay my own bills, buy my daughter the things that she needs, or would want. I want to be able to buy things that Canito and I need or want. I can't deal with it anymore. I hate being dependant on him. I miss being independant. 


Ever since he started dating Rosa, if my power bill is $60, it's too expensive.  
Ever since he started dating Rosa, my daughter is too skinny for his liking.
Ever since he started dating Rosa, he's always broke.
Ever since he started dating Rosa, he's always tired.
Ever since he started dating Rosa, we don't have more than 5 minute conversations.
Ever since he started dating Rosa, our relationship, and friendship have changed.
Ever since he started dating Rosa, all he can do is criticize my abilities at being a mom.
Ever since he started dating Rosa, I feel like I no longer have a father.
Ever since he started dating Rosa, I REGRET moving to Puerto Rico. 


I feel like we were better off in NY. Canito had a good paying job, and I was still getting child-support. Everything over there is EXPENSIVE AS FUCK, but we could have gone into the shelter system, and had an apartment in 6 months. At least over there, we always had money. Money doesn't buy happiness, but being broke can make a person down-right depressed. I don't want to move out of PR because of my family (not including my dad-he won't miss miss me. he has a new girl, and a new daughter to look after. and you know what, he'll tell me how much he misses us, but doesn't ask anymore when are we going over there, or when's the next time he's going to us. i'm not even going to put in the effort of driving an hour to go and an hour to come back just for him to criticize our parenting skills, or to hear about rosa, or to hear him complain. he wants to to see us? let him drive the 2 fucking hours.), and because of Canito's family. I'd miss them a lot. 
But when I told Canito how I felt, and how I regretted moving to PR, he asked if I'd like to go to PA. IDK if that's ever gonna happen. He also said that soon one of us will have a job. I sure hope so, because if not, I'm not going to be able to keep staying shut everytime my dad bitches at me. I think we could have saved up money and moved to another state if we were still in NY. If only....




P.S. To J~ IDK if my comment got posted on my last post. I did comment back. I comment back on every comment you leave, but I'm still new to this, and trying to figure it out. Let me know if it got posted, if not, I'll figure out a way to comment back. =)